Koseli Cummings

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And Now There Are Four

Silas, Age 2. Getting excited about his little brother on the way. :)

Three months ago, three of us became four. It was long anticipated and everything we knew it would be, but so much more. The flurry of excitement walking to the hospital. Waiting for contractions to kick in. Enduring when they did. Pushing a baby into the world and wanting nothing, nothing, nothing more than that in the whole world. Seeing his big, healthy body and hearing his perfect cry. Snapping our first picture seconds after his 12:12 birth. Then thinking only of how happy I felt, how much I missed Silas, and how grateful to do all this with my favorite person in the whole world.

Sondre. Seducing you softly. 2 months

And now there are four of us. Two boys! I couldn't have ever imagined something more perfect.

I don't know much about pregnancy, birth, or parenthood—what I've experienced is different than any other. Everyone's story is their own. But one thing I do know: I am grateful. I am honored to be called 'mama'—even in the middle of the night from corner of the room where our oldest sleeps. There is so much to learn, to enjoy, to refine. Our daily activities aren't monotonous and meaningless unless I dip and let them be. My mom always tells me, This is sacred. What you are doing, This is sacred. That feels so serious to me but I know it carries the weight and soul stirring I feel when I allow myself to really relish in my motherhood. It is sacred. Loving each other is sacred.

P.S. — It's not something I'd typically share, but Keenan captured Sondre's birthday so beautifully. Here it is if you'd like to see, captured and captioned in his(our? :)) own app, Days. I cried a lot of happy tears when I saw it for the first time. It's one of the best gifts he could have given me.